Hell in High Heels

You only see the beauty, never the pain

Always. — 2017/09/22

Always.

Things change in the blink of an eye. Things are good then that fast it’s storming and hailing like all hell. What you have to realize is you have no control over the weather, you can only control your reaction to the weather.

If someone pitches a hissy fit, it’s not necessarily in your purview to sort out what their issue is, you just need to keep your reaction to their crap in line. Be the bigger person.

If someone brings up your disorder to use it against you, that their short coming, NOT yours. Give yourself grace, and walk away for a minute. Love yourself through your insanity and they will come around. Maybe in a while they will be able to hear how mean it was to say that.

Like when your father or mother does something wrong by you as a child, you have to move on and do better than they did to you. For me this goes deep. It will be handled in another post possibly.

The biggest point is that you can’t control the rain, other people’s actions, or how a fire will burn. You can predict certain things, but to a certain point your reaction need to be calm, cool, and collected, ESPECIALLY if the other is off the wall. Give them time to figure themselves out, remove yourself from the situation, and be a better man than your father. Always.

 

 

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Her. — 2017/09/12

Her.

Her nail is polish is chipped. A sign to the inner turmoil she’s experienced.

Her music is loud. If it’s loud enough to bother someone else, may it be loud enough to make her feel.

Her clothes are grunge nation. She hopes that someone brings up the skulls and cross bones. Something to acknowledge that she is seen.

Her writing is a sloppy mess. Her thoughts come fragmented and incoherence reigns.

Her hair is hidden under a bandana, a signal that she can’t deal with this stuff more than anything.

Her…

Safety  — 2017/08/20

Safety 

When you become comfy being alone, you give yourself a chance to truly shine. You can be best seen when not in someone else’s shadow. You shine brilliantly, and deserve to be recognized for all you are. 

Being alone is not the end, darling. Nay, tis but the beginning. Being alone gives you the chance to realize that you are enough. Give yourself time. Realize there will be mistakes made, but better to make them while discovering how wonderful you are, then at any other time.

Two halves can’t make a whole. You don’t want to drag someone down with your shtuff. It will hurt, you will ugly cry more times than you can count, but you will heal. Say it with me. I. Can. Heal. You deserve to be wholly awesome by yourself.

Find your safety in yourself and then you might build with someone else. 

Lucifer’s demise is much like daily life — 2017/06/01

Lucifer’s demise is much like daily life

Have you ever noticed how intense things can become so quickly. Like one moment you are fine, enjoying a parade or a festival, maybe a kickass band in your backyard. You think nothing could break this eternal feeling you have, this feeling that silently screams this is where i belong, where i want to be. Then two minutes later everything feels so topsy turvy with the band’s noise turning sour in your ears faster than you thought possible. You went from cloud nine to the pits of hell faster than Satan went through his righteous demise. Did you know he was God’s most favorite angel. He had the ear of the savior all the time. He might have run his new tunes by God the Almighty, just for kicks. Many times I think people discredit Lucifer  for “falling”: But can you imagine the power he had up there… To be able to CREATE noise to be heard by the ears of god. I know some simple musicians who can’t do that halfway, and yet they think they are simply the shit. Given the range and pitch of musical notes, the complexity of the mixture seen in them one can one imagine how much “playway” Lucifer had, and the instruments he got to play! I’m kind of jealous of the Fallen one for being that musically talented.

No one — 2017/05/02

No one

No one can make you cry. No one can truly make you smile either. Your happiness or sadness depends entirely on you as a person. You choose every day whether it will be a good day or a bad day.  You solely choose who to let enter your life, and you determine who gets to stay year after year. If the people in your life make you sad or upset on a regular basis, make better choices.

 

This I know is TRUE — 2017/04/07

This I know is TRUE

One day everything will make sense. One day the bells will stop tolling for this who were in our lives and left us. One day we will find peace in who we are and will learn to strive for who we can become. In this new revelation, things will become clear that were not so before. In this time of heavy transition, patience is important. Knowing that things will eventually come together, and make sense is invaluable to your personal peace. In this hell of a season you find yourself in, personal peace is extremely important. I know you may just want to jump on a plane and take off but things here need your attention. They require you to be present and in the moment as much as anything.

 

So even when you just want to call it quits and leave, know that there is a little girl watching you, rooting for her hero not to quit.Have faith and keep pushing.

Habanero style living — 2016/12/31

Habanero style living

The key to getting good at anything is truly repetition. Giving yourself time to fail is pivotal in the learning experience. Granted it’s much easier to fail from the comfort of a two story farm house that is fully heated than from the bed of a Ford Escapade. One thing that helps me in times of failure is the knowledge that no matter what happens, music will be there to see me through my ordeal. If it’s simply too cold to move or think straight, turn on your head phones and be assured that Carrie Underwood understands. Granted when you are literally being kicked into the cold by the one person you thought was plugging for you, then things get a little dicey. But Dicey makes the flavor, right? You can’t have really hot Habaneros that are in their whole form, you gotta dice those suckers up into a beautiful array of super hotness. There will always be someone madder than you, someone in a worse position. Acknowledge that as you embrace the suck of your situation. Know yourself and how much you simply have all the necessary tools to get through this, and you’ll be just fine.

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